Where You Lead I Will Follow

I have been feeling like God wants more from me. I feel like I do not do enough in church, or in life, to serve and bring honor and glory to Him. I would also really like to be involved with a Bible study, and would start my own, but not sure anyone would come. I also feel like God wants me to get closer to the people in my church, but we live so far away from everybody else.

I guess I will continue to pray and see where God leads me. All I know is that if you are a Christian, you are good enough, and in fact, called by God to serve Him. I have let people convince me otherwise, so shame on me. I grow closer to God when I serve. So I know God wants me to serve, and He wants you too. I don't care how I serve as long as God wants me to do it. Wherever He leads, I'll go.

Update On Obeying God

As mentioned in my previous post, God made it clear to me yesterday morning that I was to apologize to a brother in Christ. I did not know how exactly I was going to do it and at the last minute came up with a plan. I told the person I wanted to talk to them after church, but, I had a deep feeling that I was supposed to go down during the invitation and make a public apology. (something I really did not want to do, and I was trying to improvise) God said uh-uh.

Our Pastor preached on obeying God ... is that not a God moment? ... I was like "OK, I understand, I will do this, just please help me do it graciously." I wanted to do it, I needed to do it, I was just scared to death!!! At the time of the invitation my first thought was to just ask the person to come down with me so that I could apologize to both him and the Pastor (another way to improvise), but again, God said no, he had other plans ... I did not have a plan of what to say ... I just asked God to take over and help me do it.

I ended up making a very public apology in front of the whole church, and afterwards hugged my brother in Christ and apologized again. He apologized to me too, which I had not expected and would have been fine if he hadn't of, but it assured me that God had gotten to us both, and that now everything would be OK.

The only downside to this is that I don't think I apologized to my Pastor, and I had intended to, but once I was put in front of the church with a microphone in my hand, I almost forgot my own name ... I don't speak well in front of large groups. Anyway ... Wednesday I plan on making sure to apologize to my pastor as well.

We felt very welcomed back to our home church. I was hugged by tons of people, and it blessed my heart to know that even when you do wrong, your brothers and sisters in Christ will forgive you and love you anyway! God is good, and all I know is that even when it's tough and not the way you want to do something, listening to God is always the best way. I feel so much better now, and I know that both God and my brother have forgiven me, and now I can be back into fellowship with them both!

Obeying God

Yesterday I was thinking about how God has not given us a clear answer about where to go to church yet. I picked up my In Touch magazine and started to read the daily devotionals and then read some in my Bible. I prayed last night, again, for God to give us an answer we would see. This morning we were watching Faith Center on TV, and then Charles Stanley came on and talked about anger, and how it doesn't matter what someone does to us, we must let go and forgive. Then he told a story about a man that stayed out of church for 5 years over something that Charles Stanley said that made him angry.

I felt so convicted, like God was telling me that in order for me to be forgiven for letting my anger keep me out of my church, I needed to apologize to someone, even though I feel they should apologize to me. I know I have said and done things that have hurt them, and so how can I expect them to do the right thing if I don't? It doesn't matter if they do the right thing or not, I have to do what God says regardless.

I don't know if this means we go back to our church for good, I know the kids really like Pathway, and if it gets them to listen and get fired up for God, than that's fine, but I don't feel like Pathway is home to me. And we have been less involved in church since leaving our home church.

Anyway, I have deleted all of the posts that I made that could have been hurtful to the person I need to apologize to, and if I see more, I will delete them too. I guess I was fooled into thinking that it was OK as long as I didn't mention names, but God knew who I was talking about... I have been very emotional all day since watching Charles Stanley, and even everything that Pastor Mike said seemed to enforce what Charles Stanley said, even though he wasn't saying anything even close ... so I know God is wanting this. Now I just have to swallow my pride, humble myself, and do the right thing ... and that is the hardest part. Please pray for me!

WOW!

Tonight we heard a service about complaining. It was REALLY good. I know I needed to hear it. Not sure who has been complaining about their Sunday school class ... My Sunday school class is AWESOME, and we have awesome Deacons, Teachers, and Ministers at my church.

I know I drink the Cherry Limeade a lot ... (It was in the sermon ... had to be there). And sometimes we get tired of drinking the cherry limeade and are human and complain about it. Luckily we have forgiveness from our Father in Heaven, and hopefully from our Brothers and Sisters in Christ too.

Have a great, glorious, and blessed evening!

Blog Soup

Tonight's service was awesome, we got into small groups and prayed for our church leaders and for our government leaders. I love prayer services, I am very big on praying for others. I believe that is when God moves the most is when we are praying for people other than ourselves.

I got to thinking ... Ever notice how we all like to point out other people's sins and somehow try to say they are worse than our own? For example, say someone commits adultery, you will hear people gasp and oooh and awww and say how bad that is, but then they totally dismiss their own sins as though they are "better" because it wasn't adultery ... and I'm just using that as an example. It could be lying or judging another, or any sin for that matter.


I don't know why we do that, I suppose due to the guilt of our own sins, we have to find someone "worse" than ourselves to make us feel better. This is one area I am going to try and work on in myself because God says if we break one commandment, we break them all, and all sin is detestable to him regardless if it is murder, adultery, or stealing a dime from your momma'a purse. We need to remember that we are all saved from the same blood of Jesus Christ. He died for my sins just like he died for yours.

I have been having a lot on my heart and mind lately. I have friends that have gone through a lot and in need of prayer and support. Another couple we are friends with are about to be seperated beyond their control and will need lots of prayer and support. I feel like as a church family we need to stay on top of the needs of our people and give them as much love and support as we can because each person is part of the body of Christ, and each person is important.

God is moving and I want to be where HE is doing HIS work. I pray that you will have a great, glorious, and blessed week.

So Far So Good

God has already answered two of my prayers this week, both on Monday. I released everything to him and now that I am out of the way, he is working on it. I may have a third answered prayer by the end of the week!!!!

I am still waiting to hear about my thyroid ultrasound. I am really not wanting to have a needle stuck in my neck ... haven't you heard that nurses and doctors make the worse patients? Yeah, that's me, a nurse in training and I am the WORST patient. I want vercet if they do the biopsy, that's the only way to go ... to Lala land, Ha ha!

I am busy-busy-busy this week with school. We are learning how to do IV's very first thing ... It's exciting but a bit scary at the same time. I have had bad experiences with IV's myself, and you have to "practice" in order to get good, but I don't want to practice on a real person :-(

I probably won't post as often as I did over the summer due to my busy schedule, but I will update as soon as God moves my mountain! Have a great, glorious, and blessed week!

For Your Information (Update)

This is my blog. It is like an online prayer journal. I can go back and look and see how God got me through the things that happen in my life, and yes, so can any body else. It may bother some that I am very honest on my blog, but all I can say is that if it bothers you more what I put on here, then it does for what someone is actually doing to hurt me and my family, then you probably have your priorities all messed up.

Those that are lost need to know that Christians are not perfect either. Even though we are saved, we make mistakes everyday. Deleting my blog would be like erasing my testimony, and I refuse to do that.

Our Battle With Satan

We always hear that we cannot argue with the Bible. If it is in the Bible, we must believe it. You cannot believe part of the Bible, you must believe the WHOLE Bible. So therfore ...

The Bible tells us in Matthew 18:15-17

A Brother Who Sins Against You

15 "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16 But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector."

So for those that disagree with us, I am sorry, but it is in black and white right there in your Bible.

I'm Still Looking Up

Yesterday I sent an email to the principal at school that was with my son at the middle school last year. I sent him a picture of Austen's face and told him what happened. He called me and asked me where it happened, and why, and then told me to pursue charges. When I told him that the boy's uncle was major and that I had filed a report with the City Police, but I was afraid they would sweep it under a rug (so to speak), he told me that a week was too long for them to arrest the boy, and that he would work on it for me and try to get something done about it today.

He loves Austen, and has been very good to us. But he said since it started at school and then they fought in Calvert, that the school could handle it. PRAISE GOD!!! I just hope God is smiling down on us for dealing with this the right way, and that this boy stops getting away with things just because of his family name.

He gets into fights all the time, and his dad brags about it. The boy boxes, there is video of him boxing on Facebook. I seen it last night right before I removed him from my son's friends list.

I went to the Church about some of the things this family has done to us, but they felt it wasn't a church problem. I disagreed, but what can I do? Now it has resolved to fighting ... so hopefully God will deal with it, even if no one else wants to.

Just please pray for our family at this time. Once the boy is charged, I have a bad feeling things will get worse as far as harassment from this family goes. It says in the Bible not to sue a brother, but everyone has left us no choice.

What To Do?

God has been dealing with me over many things lately. Some of them are things I do, and some are what others do. I have been really having a hard time dealing with things that are going on at church lately that I totally disagree with. I have actually thought about changing churches, but that won't help what is going on, but it don't do a bit of good to talk to anyone about it either. Besides, I love so many people at my church!

I keep praying, and then someone else tells me things that have been said or have been done, and it just gets me upset all over again. I'm thinking God wants us to try to help, but I don't know where to begin. I'm gonna keep praying because I know God will deal with all of it in HIS time.

Did We Fail Them?

I have two great friends whom I adore. They have been going through a rough time the past couple of months. Satan has tried very hard to drive them apart. Stanley and I have prayed for them and supported them 100%, trying to help them in any way we know how.

They told me yesterday that are switching churches, and this really broke my heart. I can't help but wonder if maybe as a church we failed them. Maybe we didn't show enough love and support to them. Maybe too many people were whispering and taking sides, and they felt like they needed to be somewhere where people wouldn't judge them??? I don't know, but I know that as Christians, we should NEVER advocate for, encourage, or push for anyone to get a divorce. God created marriage, Satan created divorce.

I just pray that they both do whatever it takes to keep their marriage together. They must put their marriage under God, and before anyone else in their family. And I pray that God heals everything, and that their marriage will be stronger for all that they are enduring now. Please pray for this couple. You don't have to know their names because God knows who they are. pray that God will bind Satan and keep him from tearing them apart, and that they won't worry about what other people think, that they will fight for their marriage with everything they've got! Thank you, and God bless you!

Awesome Day At Church Yesterday

Yesterday at church was AWESOME! Our youth pastor brought the message and it was a good one. It was about faithfulness, service, tithing, and how we should be in the word daily. I know God was speaking to me and Stanley. We have said I don't know how many times, that we are going to get a daily devotional started, but we never do.

We also used to tithe like we were supposed to, and when we did. everything worked out like it was supposed to, but something happened and it got to be an every now and then thing and now things aren't working so good. I don't know how we tithed to begin with because there is never enough money to pay all the bills, much less tithe, but God works it out when your faithful and obedient to him. We have to get back to tithing like we are supposed to, but it will take total trust in God because money is so incredibly tight right now.

Last night we watched The Climb during the evening servive at church. That is a real good movie. I see nothing wrong with showing a movie at church as long as it is about God. Of course, someone always has to complain about it, and sure enough, one did.

TeamKid

Last night the kids played outside, so I decided to help with snacks instead. I should have went outside (even though it was hot), because sometimes I let my mouth override my brain and say things I shouldn't ... Last night was no exception. The Lord showed me the error of my ways and hopefully I will learn to keep my mouth shut.

I don't know what is wrong with me lately, I just keep blurting things out that get on my nerves. It is good that I talk about my problems, but not exactly the way I have been doing it. I am just really sick of some things that have been going on and I guess it's my way of dealing with it. I need to learn to pray and talk to God about it and no one else.

We have a meeting on Sunday to figure out who is doing what in TeamKid this year. Last year we did two things, the warm up and the recreation. I'm not sure we (Stanley & I) want to do those again (mainly the warm up), but I would guess that if no one else chooses them, we will have to. I think we may have enough help this time that we should only have to do one of those. I hope so because we are also doing the bus ministry, and though I want us to do all that we can to help, I don't want to overload myself either because of school.

Well I hope you have a great, glorious, and blessed day!

Disappointed

Apparently the Upward program won't let boys and girls play on football teams together, because it can cause self esteem issues if the girls run faster than the boys. I guess they didn't think about the self esteem of little girls who are told they can't play because of that reason.

My daughter is so upset that there isn't enough girls to play football. She was really looking forward to playing football. I guess she will have to be a cheerleader instead. I guess Upward isn't that different from regular football other than they use flags and have devotionals.

Regardless, I hope kids are saved, and even some moms and dads too. Have a great day!

Moving Upward

I am really excited about what God is going to do through Upward Football & Cheerleading at our church. It is a great outreach opportunity. I got the phone call last night that I am a cheerleading coach for 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade girls. That's exciting! I had to ask off for Saturday at work so that I could attend the meeting and meet the girls I'll be coaching.

My oldest son is going to be a referree for football, my husband was going to try to help out, but he isn't big on sports so he doesn't know enough to be a coach or referee. He wants to help out in any way he can though. I'm sure with nearly 100 kids, there will be room for helpers :) I just pray that through the Upward program that God will be glorified and that others will see Christ in us and kids will be saved.

Answered Prayers

Isn't it amazing how a Sunday morning at church can be God's way of answering your prayers? I have been dealing with issues this week. Issues like having so many responsibilities that I feel overwhelmed, to dealing with Satan coming at me through people I love or encounter in my life. Today our Sunday School teacher and our Pastor covered both of these issues. The answer, of course, is to look to God, not only in prayer, but by getting into His word as well. Something I have been neglecting to do. I pray all the time, prayer is easy, but sitting down to be still and quiet long enough to read my Bible isn't so easy.

God really spoke to me this morning, and I feel so blessed to have a Heavenly Father who forgives me for my many failures in this life. His mercy and love are an amazing, wonderful, and sometimes overwhelming miracle. I feel so useless sometimes as a child of God, that I'm not doing enough to bring others to Christ, or that I don't serve in every way I can. I try so hard to be a tool that He can use, but still I know I don't do enough.

I have a few people in my life that I would love to see come to Christ. I pray for them continually. I talk to them about God and Jesus, yet I haven't gotten anywhere. I am going to be a counselor at the Will Graham Celebration, and hopefully and prayerfully I can get them to come. I pray that God speaks to them so strongly that they can't deny Him anymore.

I pray that your day is or will be as big of a blessing as mine has been! God Bless You!

College/School/Church Happenings

I changed my fall schedule at college. The Assistant Dean of Nursing advised me that trying to take English 102 while taking nursing classes and medical microbiology would be a full load. She told me that I should cancel my Phlebotomy class and put English 102 and Intro To Art in its place. This will also help me to be home around 4PM instead of 8PM, and I'm sure my husband and children are delighted with that.

The kids start back to school August 7th. I have enjoyed them but I am ready to have my peace and quiet back. My grocery bill will also go down and that's always a plus. They are excited and I am excited for them. I cannot believe that my youngest boys are going to be in middle school this year. My how time flies!

Tomorrow is our Homecoming at church and I cannot wait. The singing and the music put you in the proper worship mood, and then the preaching puts you back on the right path. I am fixing broccoli and cauliflower casserole and "Heavenly Eggs" (as my Sunday School teacher calls them) We have a big potluck meal afterwards, last years was awesome!

Have a great, glorious, and blessed day!

What A Blessed Sunday!

Wow! I can't even begin to describe Sunday at our church. It was awesome to say the least! When you have a lot of people truly worshipping the Lord, you can feel his presence so strongly that it just does something to you.

Saturday I had worked 10.75 hours, and while I was working I started feeling really bad. I get bad cramps for no reason, doctors think it's endometriosis, we got to do some things to find out for sure. Anyway, the cramps make walking a chore. I came home, Stanley and I went to the store to buy easy stuff so I wouldn't have to cook, we got a couple of movies and came back home. I was still cramping. We ate and started watching the second movie and I fell asleep.

I didn't sleep well all night though because of the cramping, I woke up Sunday morning feeling really bad, and was planning on staying home. All of a sudden I jumped up to get ready, mainly because I thought we were singing a certain song in the choir and I didn't want to miss it, (I rarely miss church)...we didn't sing that song, but I am so glad I didn't miss church because I would have missed out on the blessing of worshipping God.

Sunday night was full of worship as well. The songs and the scripture really touched me. I pray every Sunday is like this. That we don't just go through the motions, but truly worship the Lord and watch him work.

Have a great, glorious, and blessed day!

I Feel Blessed

I really enjoyed church this morning and tonight. I love being in God's house with God's people. Too bad everyday isn't Sunday.