March For Babies

As a nurse in Labor & Delivery, I see sick babies, and babies born too early on a constant basis. This breaks my heart. Babies born too early have to stay in a NICU and usually can't spend much time with their mom & dad.  :-(

I'm very excited to be a part of March for Babies this year. Please help me reach my goal by making a donation to my walk. It's easy and secure - just click the link below to make your donation.

Your gift will fund March of Dimes research and programs that help moms have full-term pregnancies and babies begin healthy lives. And it will be used to bring comfort and information to families with a baby in newborn intensive care.

Please support this important work. You can make a donation with your credit card or debit card online by clicking the link below.

http://www.marchforbabies.org/Cindy_Stevenson

Thank you for helping me give all babies a healthy start!  God bless!

WARNING

I call it like I see it!! There is no in between, it is either BLACK or WHITE, RIGHT or WRONG, HEAVEN or HELL.  Everything in life is a choice, it is up to us what we choose ...  however there is NO IN BETWEEN!!! ~copied from a friend on Facebook, and I agree!

COFFEE IS MY BLOOD TYPE

Coffee is my drink; I shall not doze. It maketh me to wake in green pastures: It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses. It restoreth my buzz: It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction, I will fear no Equal™: For thou art with me; thy cream and thy Sweet n Low™, they comfort me. Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of Starbucks™: Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over. Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life: And I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever. ~Author Unknown

Anisocoria

A few years ago we went to Six Flags and I rode that crazy Superman ride, and when I got off, I had a headache and my right eye was blurred, and my husband told me we needed to go to the ER because my right eye was dilated so big that he could barely see the color of my eye.  I did not go, thinking it was nothing.  It continued, and it was causing me some problems. The doctors were very concerned and I had numerous CAT SCANS and MRI's, and seen eye doctors, opthamologists, neurologists, etc. and no one could figure out why my eye was dilating.  I was also having migraines and sinus problems, so I had sinus surgery and they put me on Lexapro to prevent the migraines, and then the dilating stopped.

Well now, to my knowledge, I have no sinus infection, but I have always had sinus problems, and I have bad allergies.  I have not been having migraines or eye pain, but now my right eye is starting to dilate again.  I also noticed that the same eye droops a little.  I know when my eye dilates because it is very hard to read or even see, because my vision is so blurred.

This has me concerned.  I went through nursing school, I know that anisocoria could mean several things, including some things that are very serious.  All I know is that it is very bothersome to me, and it scares Stanley when he sees it.  So I guess I will have to have all of these tests again.  I just pray that they will figure it out this time and they can stop it.  God willing, they will.

Things Have To Get Better ... Eventually

It came to my attention several months ago that I suffer from depression. It's not so bad that I want to hurt myself, it's just causing me to want to stay home, sleep, and stay away from the people I love. I don't know what triggered it, but the latest news of my mother's condition surely has not helped it.

I finally went to the doctor today and asked for some help. Although I know that a pill is not going to make me happy, or make the possibility of losing my mother any easier ... It surely will help the hopelessness I feel, the lack of interest in things I once enjoyed, and maybe, just maybe, it will keep the tears from falling quite so often.

I think it started when I graduated from nursing school. In nursing school you bond with people who know exactly what you are going through. You spend lots of time together, and become a family. I haven't seen hardly any of my friends from nursing school since graduation. So I don't have that support system anymore.

It feels kind of like losing your best friend ... which in a way, that happened to. My best friend moved out in February and I have seen her twice since. She works a very tiring schedule, and rarely has time for her own family. I miss her.

My husband does not understand how I feel, and that isn't his fault, it is hard to sympathise with someone when you have never been through that something before. So it is hard for him to be supportive.  I know lately that my depression has caused some issues with us, and recognizing that is half the battle I suppose.

The doctor put me on Pristiq. I am hoping it helps. I am praying it helps. Surely I can't feel any worse than I do right now.  Prayers would be greatly appreciated.

A Song Says It All

I was sure by now,God,
that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining.
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.


And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm.

Even though I am depressed and upset about a situation that I thought God had already taken care of, I know I must keep praising Him through this storm because He has plans, and even though I do not understand His plans, and I want to step in and do something, I must wait patiently on Him. Not easy to do when there are timelines, but I am asking God to give me the strength to endure and wait. His will, not mine, His timing, not mine. Amen

Where You Lead I Will Follow

I have been feeling like God wants more from me. I feel like I do not do enough in church, or in life, to serve and bring honor and glory to Him. I would also really like to be involved with a Bible study, and would start my own, but not sure anyone would come. I also feel like God wants me to get closer to the people in my church, but we live so far away from everybody else.

I guess I will continue to pray and see where God leads me. All I know is that if you are a Christian, you are good enough, and in fact, called by God to serve Him. I have let people convince me otherwise, so shame on me. I grow closer to God when I serve. So I know God wants me to serve, and He wants you too. I don't care how I serve as long as God wants me to do it. Wherever He leads, I'll go.

Show Me What I'm Looking For

(Click on the title above to watch the video)

Wait, I'm wrong
Should've done better than this
Please, I'll be strong
I'm finding it hard to resist

So show me what I'm looking for

Save me, I'm lost
Oh Lord I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Oh Lord

Don't let go
I've wanted this far too long
Mistakes become regrets
I've learned to love abuse
Please show me what I'm looking for

Save me, I'm lost
Oh Lord I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Oh Lord

Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for

Save me, I'm lost
Oh Lord I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
To save me from being confused
Wait, I'm wrong
I can't do better than this
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused

Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Oh Lord

God Doesn't Believe in Athiests

It takes more faith to believe in evolution than to believe that God exists. For those who believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God, and died on the cross to save us from our sins ... Well, to quote my husband, "We can see God around us, and we can feel his holy spirit inside of us." We see and feel God every single day. You can't argue with that. But one can definitely argue with the "Big Bang Theory".

Open a Bible, and let God speak to you. Trust in Him and He will never leave you or forsake you.

Make sure you have placed your faith in the right place. Your eternity depends on it.

Just One More Hurdle

Well I finally graduated from nursing school ... Well, pinned actually, graduation isn't until May, but doubtful I go. I can't believe it's finally over. It seems like I just started school in some ways, and in others, it feels like it has been forever.

I am just so thankful to God for his many blessings, and for seeing me through. I just have one more hurdle to cross, and that is my state board exam. It is soon. I am studying a little everyday until I take it, and I have faith that I will do fine. God wouldn't have led me to it if he wasn't on planning on getting me through it!

Just please be in prayer for me, that I will not be nervous (I have serious test anxiety), and that I will pass boards and then all I have to worry about is all of my training and orientation. Thanks so much!

God bless!

Pray For Me

I’m studying for nursing school finals!  It’s almost over!  PRAISE GOD!

Reflecting ...

Nursing school is hard! Getting accepted into nursing school is hard! But here I am just 2 and a half weeks from being finished. WOW!

I can't take all the credit though, actually none of the credit. ... 3 years ago I felt led to go to nursing school, and had absolutely no faith in my abilities to be able to do it. I prayed about it, and God told me "Ask, Seek, and Knock.", and He told me to take a leap of faith, that He would be with me the whole way if I trusted in Him. I did, I trusted Him completely, and He was there the whole way, and many times He carried me :)

I owe it all to Him ... It just goes to show that God will not ever lead you to do something that He won't help you get through or do. I praise Him! I thank Him! And I know that I am doing His will by being a nurse ... Now if I only knew what department He wanted me in ...

Prayer Request

My family is in need of prayer. I won't go into any details as some things need not be made public (even prayer requests), but just ask that you keep my entire family in your prayers, God knows what is happening. Thank you.

My Spiritual Gifts

I took a quiz that my son brought home from his youth group. It is supposed to help you figure out your spiritual gifts. I already had an idea of mine since I watched a series that Charles Stanley did on the subject, but decided to take it and see what it said.

I scored a 15 in Mercy:

A person who is gifted in the area of mercy has immediate compassion for those suffering physically, mentally, or emotionally. He/She derives great joy in meeting the needs of others, and often has a tendency to attract people who are in distress.(VERY TRUE) He/She usually has a need for friendships in which there are deep communication and mutual commitment, and has the ability to draw out the feelings of others while also being vulnerable to hurts, both personally and to those which others are experiencing. Often, he/she would rather remove the causes of hurts than look for benefits from them. He/She has a tendency to avoid confrontation and firmness, and often closes his/her spirit to others whom he/she feels are overly harsh or critical.(SO ME) If you scored high in this area, you should consider being involved in a ministry that enables you to minister to those who are hurting and who need the sensitivity you have to offer. (I think Nursing falls into that ministry, but I also plan on visiting people in the hospital once I start working and have the time.)

I scored a 14 in Exhortation:

A person who is gifted in the area of exhortation has a special ability to encourage others in the Body of Christ by giving them needed words of comfort, courage, and counsel in times of need or crisis. (I've often thought I should be a counselor as well as a nurse) He/She is especially attracted to individuals who are genuinely seeking spiritual growth and often is willing to share past personal failures to help motivate others toward greater spiritual maturity. He/She is able to make accurate assessments of spiritual needs, and has the ability to explain truth with logical reasoning, giving step-by-step instructions which are easy to follow. If you scored high in this area, you should consider being involved in an area that enables you to use your strengths to minister one-on-one with people in need.

I scored a 12 in Prophecy:

A person who is gifted in the area of prophecy has the ability to proclaim God's truth without compromise. He/She has strong convictions and expects others to as well. He/She has the need to express himself/herself verbally, especially regarding right and wrong and may be quick to make judgments of others and to speak his/her opinion.(That's so me) He/she may be painfully direct when correcting others, possessing an unusual ability to discern the sincerity of others (Oh yeah, and Stanley really has that gift). He/She is persuasive in defining right and wrong, and is very persistent in expressing his/her feelings regarding needs for change. (AMEN) If you scored high in this area, you should look for a ministry wherein you can challenge others to live by God's standards as set forth in His Word.

I scored a 12 in Service:

A person gifted in the area of service has the ability to perform any task with joy that benefits others and meets practical needs. (I LOVE HELPING OTHERS) He/She may have the tendency to disregard personal health and comfort to serve others. he/She often has an attention for details, and appreciates having clear instructions to follow. (OH YEAH, AND FEELING NEEDED IS VERY IMPORTANT TOO.) He/She enjoys the process of serving. (YES) If you scored high in this area, you should consider being involved in a ministry in which your strengths of faithfulness and attention can be utilized. (I TRY TO SERVE OTHERS EVERY CHANCE I GET, BUT I FIND IT HARD WHEN I DON'T DO ANYTHING, AND WHEN I DON'T FEEL NEEDED OR APPRECIATED).

Things I'd Like To Do Before I Die (That Will Help Me Grow Spiritually)

Teach a Sunday School class. (young kids or young adults)
Share my testimony in front of a large group.
Walk a close friend to Christ... or several :)
Help married couples who are having problems.
Witness to a complete stranger.
Sing a solo without puking that fits my vocal range:)
Help someone in need.
Save a life.
Go on a mission trip in another country.
Sing a song with Brianna (my daughter).
Renew my wedding vowels at Rosebower.
Have the courage to do what God puts on my heart without letting others put doubt in my mind.
Show people the true me ... I limit myself and hide myself out of fear.
Work with Hospice and the Red Cross.

It's Been A While ...

My computer decided some time ago that it did not like my blog anymore because it would show an error and not let me see the front page. I think it must have gotten over it now :)

My life has been very busy of late, school is fixing to start back, and my relaxing summer will be over! But the good news is that I will be done this Decemeber!!! I am so excited!

I have a big to-do list today, so I must get ready to go. Have a great, glorious, and blessed day!

I Have Learned ...

The biggest hypocrites are not the sinners who go to church, but the sinners who go to church saying they didn't sin.

Never tell your problems to anyone but to God or your therapist.

Some people forgive, but some don't.

We tend to always look at others sins as worse than our own, even though they are NOT.

People will judge you and choose not to like you, maybe even with no fault of your own, but it's OK. You will survive!

NEVER let others opinions of you become your reality.

You can never be too bad for Jesus, only too good!

It is possible for you to be too big for God to use, but never to small for God to use. We tend to disagree with that and think only Christians who have been in church all of their lives can do anything. We grow best by reading the Word and by working for God.

When you're accusing others of all they didn't do, their glaring lack reflects right back, and the spotlight points at you!

The Lord love the honest sinner better than the hypocritical self-righteous person.

The smallest package in all the World is a man wrapped up in himself.

Feeling Blessed & Exhausted

We just finished VBS on Thursday. I love VBS, but for some reason it wore me out this year. Possibly because we had 15-27 kids every night just in our class (5th & 6th). It was a lot of fun, especially seeing the kids getting excited about being able to put a pie in someones face for not knowing the Bible verse.

I know God was working on several of the kids that were in our class, one that we brought, but they haven't made a decision for Christ yet ... but the seeds were planted, the gospel was shared, and I had the opportunity to witness to the girl we brought, and I have faith that she will make a decision, she just isn't ready yet.

A lot of people get anxious or nervous about sharing their faith and witnessing to others. I do when it comes to complete strangers, but if I know someone, it doesn't bother me at all. I have witnessed to several people who are in my life that are lost, and I pray continually that they will be saved before it is too late.

But back to VBS ... I think all of the VBS workers did a great job this year, and the kids were amazing! When you have that many kids in one class, you expect them to act up, but they were really good considering. I feel very blessed to have been a part of it! I just hope next year that I am able to do something a little more challenging. ;-) But I thank God for the ability to help whereever needed, and for all the kids that came and heard about HIM.

My Progress

It has been a little over a month since I started going to the gym (April 22, 2009), and I still have had no major weight loss yet. The scale varies, sometimes it says I’ve lost 4lbs. and sometimes it says I’ve lost 2 lbs. BUT, I measured myself on May 6thth, and then today (May 26, 2009) and I have lost inches!!!

I’ve lost:

1 inch on upper arms
1 1/2 inches on chest
1 inch on waist
½ inch on thighs
½ inch on calves.

So I’ve lost 4 ½ inches total … GO ME!!!

I try to workout everyday, but I started when I was in school and was studying for finals, so I missed a week for that, and then I have missed several days from time to time for reasons beyond my control (gym was closing early, company coming over, not feeling well, etc.) So I would guess that I have really only went about a half of a month, so I think I am doing very well considering.

It was helpful that I listened to a CD my sister burned for me over the 7 deadly sins, and sloth and gluttony really convicted me. Our society is really pushing people to be gluttons with biggie size food and buffets. We should only be eating normal serving sizes, and not until we feel full. It is ok to leave food on our plates, really it is!

Overeating is a major cause of illness in this country … Diabetes is linked with it (type 2 that is), heart disease is linked to it, and vascular disease is linked to it, and high cholesterol and high blood pressure too, as well as other diseases, so maybe we should STOP overeating!!!

Have a great and glorious day!

[Insert Witty Title Here]

It has been a week since Austen started using his insulin pump, and things are going very well. I am thrilled at how well it is working and how Austen has taken the initiative in taking care of himself. I know how to work his pump, but he has been doing it all himself.

This is my first week of no school and I guess I am enjoying it ... it would be better if I weren't a tad under the weather with allergies, but it is better than driving to Paducah everyday. Although, I have had to drive to Mayfield for Austen's doctor appointment, and will have to again tomorrow to see the dietitian so she can adjust his insulin rates if necessary.

I have started Professor Grant Horner's Bible-Reading System, where you read 10 chapters of the Bible everyday. It is set up so that you are reading Proverbs and Acts completely through in a month, and you are also reading both the Old and New Testaments, which I like. I read my first 10 chapters last night, and plan on doing today's 10 here in a little bit.

God is good all the time, and I am always amazed and in complete awe of how he works!

ALSO, if you would be so kind to check out my sister's blog, she needs some help with getting to the Living Water's Ambassador's Academy that she was accepted into, so if you would like to donate to help her, please visit her blog. You can pay by PayPal or by credit card.

By donating you are entering in a chance to win a great book!